Holy F%*#! The art of learning how to connect spiritually during physical interactions with our partners can expand the definition of what we consider sex. Much of what we call "sex" remains near the outskirts of what is possible as far as cultivating energy between two people or yourself. Where you are having fun, but you aren’t doing anything memorable – it’s not one for the books. You may flirt, make eye contact, relax and relieve some stress from the day. You may even feel physically aroused. Your breath may deepen and perhaps you even orgasm once. Maybe not the kind that rocks your soul, but compelling enough to remind you that you have a body and having sex feels wonderful.
What if you could change or enhance that? What if you were having sex that made you lose track of time and space. What if you lost track of how many orgasms you had? What if you could feel pure natural ecstasy before, during, and after your sexcapades? Do you want that feeling? Do you want to have mind-blowing sex? Do you think you are worth or can have an experience like that?
These are some of the questions you have to ask yourself when you start to dive into the world of spiritually connected sex. There are a few different components to explore to start to tap into to invite this kind of energy into your sex life.
-The physical element is where you let the senses bring awareness into your body and flood your entire being. You drop into the senses of touch, smell, taste, hearing, and seeing. You use these senses to start to slow your monkey mind and relax into the present moment. You can start to incorporate lighting candles, putting chill, sexy music on, eye gazing, and light touch to allow yourself to unwind from the day. You if you don’t slow your mind down before you start anything physical it can be hard to be fully present with your partner.
2.) Feel and Express Your Emotions
-This is where you can speak your truth about where you are at emotionally in the present moment. If you are feeling sensitive then speak that, if you are feeling very passionate speak that. The more you let your partner know where you are the more you give them permission to meet you there and you with them. If you can’t express the way that you are feeling to your partner it will be very hard to ask for what it is you want. Think about the fact that you are merging with another person and to fully let go you need to trust and communicate with them.
3.) Ask for What You Want & Allow Yourself to Dissolve
-Ask for what you want and what you need to feel desired and pleasured. The more you let go of the fantasy that the perfect person will just know your body and everything you like, the more you can start own that you need to ask for what you want. If you need to have someone kiss the back of your neck after you orgasm, ask for it. If you need someone to move you into a different position, ask for it. If you can start to ask for what you want sexuality asking for a raise won’t seem that hard. When are getting exactly what we need to start to feel, drop in, and orgasm then we start to enter the world of dissolve. When you are asking for what you want you are able to fully enjoy the experience and not in your head thinking, “I wish he/she would do….”. No one can “give” you an orgasm, you have to allow the experience to move through your body.
These are some of the first steps in expanding your spiritual connection to yourself and your partner. You can keep having the same old, same old sex if that is what you desire - or you can start having an authentic conversation and feel the fullness of who we are as sexual human beings. Stay tuned for part 2 where we dive in a bit deeper!!!!